Reclaiming Power Through Anger Work
There’s no denying it—being a trans person in the United States right now can feel overwhelming and scary. Each day seems to bring more negative news, restrictive laws, and rhetoric aimed at undermining our existence. For many of us, this barrage of harm can leave us feeling stuck, frozen, and powerless. It’s easy to go into a state of despair when faced with so much hostility and uncertainty. But there are ways to move through these feelings and reclaim our power—and anger work is one of them.
Why We Freeze
When faced with overwhelming stress, our nervous systems naturally go into one of four states: fight, flight, fawn or freeze. The freeze response is the body’s way of coping when we feel we can neither fight back nor run away. It’s a protective mechanism, but staying in freeze mode for too long can leave us feeling numb, disconnected, and hopeless.
To move out of freeze mode, our bodies need to re-engage our fight or flight systems. This is a biological truth for mammals, ourselves included. Think of a deer escaping a predator: after freezing in fear, it shakes off the experience, literally using movement to discharge the pent-up energy. For humans, the key to breaking free of freeze mode often lies in engaging our emotions, particularly anger.
Anger: The Antidote to Fear
Anger gets a bad reputation. It’s often seen as destructive or out of control. But anger, when used intentionally, is a powerful and necessary emotion. Anger is the antidote to fear—it reconnects us to our sense of agency and power. Where fear can leave us feeling small and helpless, anger helps us push back, reclaim space, and assert our boundaries.
For those of us in marginalized communities, expressing anger can feel especially fraught. Many of us have been taught that anger is dangerous, unproductive, or unwelcome. But in reality, anger is a tool. When used thoughtfully, it helps us process emotions, discharge the stress stored in our bodies, and move toward a more regulated and empowered state.
How to Work With Anger
Engaging with anger doesn’t have to be scary or chaotic. It’s about finding healthy, intentional ways to tap into and release this powerful energy. Here are some techniques you can try:
Journaling: Write freely about what’s making you angry. Let it all out without censoring yourself. You might find it helpful to write letters (that you don’t send) to the people or systems causing harm.
Yelling: Find a safe space to yell—into a pillow, in your car, or even outside if you’re able. Let your voice carry the weight of your anger.
Batting Cages or Axe Throwing: These are physical, active ways to channel frustration and anger in a safe and controlled environment. The key here is to pair what you are angry about with the physical activity. Allow yourself to think, or even verbalize, your angry thoughts while you are engaging in the physical activity.
Boxing or Martial Arts: Punching a bag or practicing controlled movements can be incredibly cathartic and grounding. Again, making sure to pair your anger with the physical exertion.
Art: Use painting, drawing, or other forms of art to express your emotions. Don’t worry about making it look good—just let your feelings flow onto the canvas or paper.
The Importance of Soothing
Once you’ve engaged your fight or flight system through anger work, it’s crucial to soothe your nervous system afterward. While very cathartic and healing, anger work can also get things stirred up that then need to settle again when we are finished. This step helps bring your body back to a regulated state and ensures you don’t get stuck in an elevated state of stress.
Here are some ways to soothe after anger work:
Practice deep, slow breathing.
Listen to a guided meditation or engage in a mindfulness practice.
Wrap yourself in a cozy blanket or hold a weighted object for grounding.
Take a warm bath or shower to relax your body.
Listen to calming music or sounds that help you feel safe.
Connect with someone you trust, even if it’s just to sit together in silence.
Reclaiming Your Power
Anger work is not about being angry all the time. It’s about allowing yourself to feel and process this powerful emotion so it doesn’t remain bottled up, turned inward, or come out sideways at undeserving people. By engaging with anger, you can break free from freeze mode, reconnect with your inner strength, and move through the world with a greater sense of power and regulation. From that empowered and regulated state, it is much easier to get clear about what actions you want to take.
As trans people, our existence is powerful. Every time we choose to reclaim our worth, to process our emotions, and to move forward with love and strength, we are pushing back against the forces that try to diminish us. Anger work is just one tool in the larger toolbox of healing, but it’s a powerful one.
Take the time to feel your anger, move through it, and soothe yourself. You are worthy of care, of power, and of healing. Together, we can build resilience, reclaim joy, and continue to move forward, no matter how hard the times may be.
Supporting Each Other
If this resonated with you, share it with someone who might benefit. Let’s continue to build a community that uplifts and strengthens one another. You are not alone.
